Detective Jared Flynn, Everyone Say Hi!!!!

Detective Flynn. Oh, that name, so powerful. Oh that young man, so handsome, so strong. 

I just can't wait to introduce him. I'll try. Detective Flynn knows how to rescue a lady in distress. I can't even tell you how he literally risked death to save love. That sounds real dramatic, and I'm sorry for that, but it's just all so fresh, and so much like a fairy tale that I'm all atwitter. I want to use some of Fern's ten dollar words but I can't think of any. I wish I was back in the day when ladies could faint on those little couches when they became over excited. But this desk chair would completely wreck my back and I'm afraid I'd snag my new chiffon exploded rainbow blouse (so cute, I had to have it!). 

So I will not swoon. 

Zula: Detective, what brought you to us? 

Jared Flynn: A phone call, literally, but I'm guessing you want something more or you'll fill in between the lines yourself. I used to work in Miami and frankly I had to leave big city crime. There was never a break from the bad news. I wanted somewhere a little easier to breath, and then I met you. 

Zula: Ha.Ha.Ha. Detective. You are so funny and charming. And strong. I don't know that I've ever enjoyed clinging to an arm more than yours. What has been the biggest reward of this case for you? 

Jared Flynn: Well, Mrs. Hopkins, the biggest reward might be the ten pounds I've gained since I met you. Or I imagine you are wanting me to mention that the case was solved with your and Miss Fern's help and how you introduced me to someone special. Would that be the right answer? 

Zula: Yes! Yes! Yes! Can you tell our readers how Fern and I helped? 

Jared Flynn: I don't know if help is the best word. I think meddling, endangering self and others and impeding an investigation might be more accurate. However, you did get so involved that it flushed the killer out, so there's that.

Zula: What advice can you give for solving crime as an upstanding citizen.

Jared Flynn: Dial 9-1-1 if it appears that there is truly an emergency. Practice being a good neighbor if it's a dispute over whether he/she should grow the same kind of roses you are. 

Zula: Oh, Detective we are out of time and I want to go off record and ask you a few questions anyhoo...

Jared Flynn: Thank you. And I've got to go Mrs. Hopkins, I've got a call coming in on another line. Bye. 

Zula: Auntie Zula, Dear, Auntie Zula! Buh Bye, Dear boy. Readers. There will be more soon. 

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Editorial comments: 

Fern: Zula, stop embarrassing that fine young man. It's inappropriate to talk about his muscles. Not okay. 

Zula: pffffttttt.